Oh gosh...never did this before but.....

[TheBetterGamer]

Can you teach me everything you know here on these forums?
I'm a serious nerd who loves learning stuff and if you could teach me, that would be a very happy moment.

[Keiji]

Putting aside the fact that you probably don't care about anything but attracting visitors to that link in your sig, if you want to learn anything you should first read the classic site and the wiki. Nobody is going to write 100 pages of text to "teach you everything we know" - everything we know is ALREADY AVAILABLE if you actually look for it.